Hi,My wife who is in Cape Town was recently sexually assaulted by her ex husband the other day. He had an existing interdict against him and an aggravated assault charge which she let drop out of a desire to "move on" but I think it was mainly out of fear of community backlash. She is an indian Muslim and has next to no rights in the community.

We tried to move on from it. However this second tragedy has broken her resolve and has shaken me to my core. She doesn't want to push the sexual assault charge. She feels like they will make her look like a "slut" and she will never get full custody of her children. I live in Australia and I have been waiting for a long time to get her over here. She fears for her children and won't leave them.

She says she had told her ex that she wasn't married anymore because every time she said we were married he would get even more erratic. I supported her decision at the time because I also just wanted to move on. He was there on our wedding day making a commotion and he even was close to grabbing her while I was standing right there!

So I completely understood why she would lie to calm him. Now she is afraid this will be used to tear her apart during questioning and she is so dispirited and I am horrified that she might let him get away and have another chance to assault her. It is hard enough for me as a man to know someone else has had his way with your wife and I was completely helpless to do anything about it! I am in Australia earning a living for my family and I just am nowhere near enough to even protect her!

Please we do not have money as he isn't paying maintenance so I am supporting her and its putting us into huge financial debts. Please I don't know if you can help but I am so desperate I have to try.

Al