Asked by the Customer on 06-09-2019 08:02:10
Question posted in the Divorce Law category relating to Western Cape

My wife of three months has filed for divorce citing mental abuse. After being together for 2 years we married in May. She moved out in August. 

Im am still trying to make sense of it and would like to just get the whole process over with. If i simply sign the papers will that be admission on my part that it was mental abuse? We did have a couple of arguments but in no way did i intimidate, belittle, intend to harm or humiliate.

Could my signing of this document be used against me for jobs or visa application?

Thank you so much

Please

Posted by Att. Patrick on 06-09-2019 11:31:10

Hi there and thank you for your question,

I am a practicing attorney based in South Africa and I will assist you with your question. Please feel free to ask as many follow up questions in order to clarify your question. If you have a new question, you must please open a new thread.

I am sorry to hear about you and your Wife. 

I am not too sure what papers you mean when you say "If i simply sign the papers", but if you mean the consent paper which would form part of the divorce order, then no, that would not necessarily be an admission on your part.

The consent paper could, in order to protect you, contain an introduction which could read similar to this - 

"WHEREAS the Plaintiff instituted an action in the above Honourable Court against the Defendant wherein which she has claimed, inter alia, a Decree of Divorce on the grounds of the marriage having broken down irretrievably.

AND WHEREAS while the Defendant denies that he ever mentally abused the Plaintiff, as the Plaintiff claims, the Defendant acknowledges that the marriage has broken down irretrievably and that there is no reasonable prospect for the restoration of a normal marital relationship between them.

AND WHEREAS the parties have arrived at an agreement relating to the parental responsibilities and rights of the minor children born of the marriage between them, maintenance payable in respect of the children, maintenance payable in respect of the parties personally, and also in regard to their proprietary rights, which agreement the parties hereto desire to record in writing and have incorporated in a final Order of Divorce in the event of the above Honourable Court seeing fit to grant a final Decree of Divorce, dissolving the marriage between the parties."

That should then cover you in case there is any worry as to whether or not you are admitting any sort of mental abuse.  Just ensure that you READ the consent paper before you sign it, because that document will set out ALL of the rights and obligations which deal with your divorce.

And no, the document can't be used against you in respect of any job or Visa application.

If there is a part of the answer which you need more advice on, or clarity please continue in this same thread instead of opening a new question.

Att. Patrick

Please remember this is a dialog if you have follow up questions please use the REPLY button and ask. If I did not answer the question you thought you were asking, please respond with the specific question you wanted answered. I hope you found my answer helpful, and you have finished asking your questions, please click on the GREEN ACCEPT button in order to mark the question as closed.

Hi there Patrick,

Thanks for your response.

So are you saying that there would be a clause in the consent papers which states that me signing is in no means an admission of mental abuse on my part?

Or would that need to be amended?

Posted by Att. Patrick on 17-09-2019 10:57:08

Yes, you could write that. Or any of your own words that you are comfortable with.